Why Fitting In Keeps You Stuck (And How to Break Free)
Personas like Barbie are sneaky because they’re not “bad.”
They’re built with good intentions.
But here’s the catch:
👉 They actually block our manifestations.
The sneaky way personas block your dream life.
We don’t wake up one day and decide, “I think I’ll create a fake version of myself today.”
But slowly, subtly, many of us do.
For me, it started young. I didn’t even realize I was putting on a mask! I just thought I was becoming the kind of girl who fit in, who was admired, who was seen!
I had this “persona” that my therapist and I later named Barbie. Barbie was polished, pretty, put-together. She wore the clothes, had the hair, looked like she belonged. And on the outside, it worked. People liked her. But here’s the thing: she wasn’t me.
Where Barbie Began
I can still remember being 16, sneaking a box of blonde dye from the drugstore and frying my hair in the bathroom while my mom was out. (Spoiler: it came out awful). The next day, I sat under a rubber cap at a salon while a stylist pulled strands of my hair through with what felt like a crochet hook. That’s when I first thought, “One day, I’ll go to a real celebrity stylist.”
Years later, I did. And while it was fun, glamorous even, it wasn’t life-changing. The “aha” moment never came. Why? Because Barbie wasn’t built from my Soul! She was built from magazines, pop stars, and the quiet ache of wanting to belong!
The Problem With Personas
Personas like Barbie are sneaky because they’re not “bad.” They’re built with good intentions. They keep us safe. (shall I say the illusion of safe) They help us feel included. But here’s the catch:
👉 They actually block our manifestations.
When we’re chasing a dream that’s meant to feed our built persona; to prove we’re pretty enough, successful enough, wealthy enough- we’re actually manifesting from LACK. And no matter how much we achieve, it doesn’t stick, because it isn’t ours!
It’s like planting seeds in plastic soil. You can water it all you want, but nothing real will grow!
How to Tell If You’re In a Persona
• You’re chasing goals that feel more like “shoulds” than soul desires.
• You get the thing you thought you wanted…and it feels empty.
• You constantly compare yourself to others, measuring your worth by their reactions or lack there of.
If that sounds familiar, you might have a Barbie of your own (or a Ken, or a different name altogether).
Baby Steps Back To Your Core
The good news… You don’t need to rip off the mask all at once. You can begin gently, with presence and curiosity:
1. Pause & Notice – Ask yourself: Is this desire mine, or Barbie’s?
2. Body Check-In – Does this goal feel expansive and energizing, or tight and performative? Your body always knows!! (Always- especially as you start to ask it more questions)
3. Soul Swap – Trade one “persona-driven” action for one “soul-driven” action today.
An example: Instead of posting for likes, write what’s actually on your heart even if it’s messy. (Especially if it’s messy.. my two cents)
From Barbie to Balance
I swung the pendulum far and I ditched beauty, ditched glamour, and hid from that old persona. But that wasn’t the answer either. Eventually, I found balance. I can enjoy beauty now without it defining me. I can radiate without needing to prove or seek validation!
And the wildest and arguably the best part? When you find that balance, you actually shine brighter than Barbie ever could and that’s because it’s the real you!
My Final Thought
Your dream life won’t land if it’s built on a mask!! But when you peel back the layers and stand in your core truth, that’s when manifestation becomes magnetic and sustaining!
So, if you’re wearing a mask; THANK it, HONOR it, and then, piece by piece, LET IT GO! The real you is so much more radiant!
✨ When you live your dream life, and your bestie does too, that’s infectious!
✨And I believe that’s how we change the world. Pass this along to a friend who’s ready to drop their mask and step into their real light!
Xx Sandra Tiffany
